Emily Henry, The Butterfly Effect, and How Existential Questioning Leads to Self-Realization
Like so many romance readers, I’ve been sucked into Emily Henry’s latest novel, Great Big Beautiful Life. This time, though, it’s so much deeper than another lighthearted romance.
The novel dives deep into family history, traumas, interpersonal conflict, and longing. One word continues to stick out: unicursal. According to the Oxford dictionary, the word means “relating to or denoting a curve or surface which is closed and can be drawn or swept out in a single movement.” In the novel, it’s referenced as a shape of path, a single line which branches in multiple directions with just one endpoint.
The concept: no matter which path we take, we will end up in the same place.
In my therapy room, I often pull questions from an existential framework. This allows me to ask clients to define meaning. While this may seem inconsequential (sure, we all have some collective meaning or viewpoints), you’d be surprised how differently some view the world. A question sticking in my head: Is my client’s view of the world unicursal? How did they end up here, and why?
It’s left me thinking deeply about the idea of fate and personal design. Do we have a say in what happens to us, or where we end up? How much gravity do our decisions really hold? Are we already on a pre-determined path, or are we constantly laying the stones that lead us to the end goal? If I pose these questions to clients, I’d likely get a different answer from each of them.
This concept has been front and center on social media in recent weeks, phrased as “the butterfly effect.” Essentially, the approach says if one small event didn’t happen, the following (often unrelated) life events wouldn’t have been accessible.
I can’t determine whether these viewpoints are right or wrong — no one can. They lie in personal opinion and the way in which we each view the world. Are things happening to us? Or are we shaping our reality as we go? Is our fate carved in stone at birth? Or is it something we mold from clay as we learn, grow, decide, and create.
Asking these questions allows my clients a deeper understanding of what they believe, what lies in their control, and who they are at their core. Existential questioning can be beneficial for clients who feel stuck or uncertain, offering a framework to explore life beyond surface-level goals or immediate challenges. Whether or not we believe in a unicursal path, reflecting on where we’ve been and where we’re going can bring meaning to the journey itself. And maybe that’s the point—not to find a definitive answer, but to stay curious about the winding, beautiful path we’re on.
If you’re looking to explore yourself and your path deeper, click here to schedule a complimentary “get to know you” call with one of our therapists.